Saturday, January 22, 2011

THE (HYPOTHERMIA) BLUES

I have had it up to HERE baby. Right up to where my itchy scarf is wrapped around my freezing neck. Is it summer yet? Is that an ice cream truck I hear? No… it's the zamboni. Because the street is an ice rink.

The very LEAST I can do to survive this frozen tundra formerly known as the United States (and not the Alaska part) is bundle up stylishly. But it can be tough to combine function and chic, as these designers prove. Below, the hypothermia hall of shame:

PRADA:
Are you kidding me with these Prada? Where are we going in this get-up - a Versailles reception à la the 17th century (plenty of exposed space for hand kissing)? Good thing blue flesh is a complimentary color to khaki.

FRENCH CONNECTION:
Is it a cape? Is it a coat? Is it made for women with short arms? Who wants to wear three quarter length sleeves in a snowstorm? Nobody, that's who. 

MILLY:
Another glove fail. Not only do they NOT KEEP HANDS WARM, which is the de facto purpose of gloves, but they look like nasty old tube socks mauled by a glue gun and some grosgrain. An Etsy disaster. That costs $135. Shame, Milly. Shame.
/Prada gloves, FC coat? cape?, Milly gloves/

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